It’s 2026, and the world is still circling the sun, and life is going on all around us. There is still good in the world and, yes, there is still bad (so much bad) in the world. Today I want to talk to you about disappointment and what we all need to do when the world lets us down. As authors, our lot seems to be to suffer. We are constantly getting rejections. We don’t get the sales we want. People don’t follow through with promises they have either made or implied (this is a big one). We are often guaranteed of something, and as soon as we get our hopes ups along comes life to take it away. It’s even more painful when we did everything we were supposed to do. When we followed the rules and did our best and we still get cut short.
It’s all crap.
We’ve all been there.
It hurts, and we feel less than.
What do we do when we feel like we’ve been kicked in the teeth? I had a boss say to me once, after a difficult day, ‘Time to go home and kick the husband and hug the dog.’ We both laughed, and for a moment we both felt better. When life gives us a gut punch, we feel our feels. We take stock of the pain and the hurt. We tell our spouse. We tell our friends, and we take solace in their love and support. This isn’t always easy. I for one, have a challenging time sharing my feelings. I’ve had friends come after me for not sharing the pains and the disappointments. I’m getting better, but I still struggle with sharing. Still, that is the first thing we should do.
After our well-earned hurt and pain, we have to pick up and figure out what to do next. This isn’t easy. This isn’t fun. And this is especially challenging if we have to see and deal with the people who hurt us. The writing community can be small, so when something falls through there is a good chance we are going to be or be around events and people who may have done us wrong. We can’t control what happened. We can’t control the people around us, all we can do is control our reactions. In this regard, we never want to do anything that is going to make us appear in an unfavorable light or cost us an opportunity. When things happen and we get upended, there are going to be people out there watching and waiting to see how we react. They may not say anything, but they will watch, and if you react badly, they will take note, and unfortunately people love spectacles, so they will gleefully share that drama (and possibly embellish), and that is what can come back and haunt us. That can hurt us even more than the original occurrence.
Are you going to stop all the drama and gossip? No, but you can give them as little fuel as possible to work with.
If you get a critical review.
Leave it.
You got rejected by an agent.
Move on.
You got turned down by a publisher.
Keep looking.
Your speaking engagement fell through.
Thank them and tell everyone how excited you are to see what they do.
An event falls flat.
Celebrate how much fun you had or how great the people were.
Someone trying to rain on your sunshine.
Then shine brighter.
We all know this. We’ve all heard everything I’ve just said before. But we need the reminder. We need to remember that when things fall apart and when we are hurting, that is the time to take stock and show the world you aren’t beaten. If you didn’t get selected for some award that you darn well deserved. Cry, shout, ‘kick the husband and hug the dog’, but when you see and hear from the people that were involved thank them, share how thrilled you are for the person they picked. Importantly, remember you’re not doing any of this for them. You’re showing who you are and you’re showing them what they missed out on.
To paraphrase a great song; You’re still standing better than you ever did? Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid. You’re still standing after all this time.
Have a great 2026 and remember, no matter what; never let the bastards get you down.
Well, those are my thoughts for this new year. Please don’t take this wrong, I’m fine and nothing is bothering me, this is all about how we look at the world and how we deal with disappointment. Until next time have a great week.
